Taking on the role of caregiver for a spouse or aging parent can be both rewarding and overwhelming. Many people who find themselves in this position struggle to maintain a balance between caring for a loved one and nurturing their personal relationships. It’s easy to understand why. From managing physician appointments to assisting with personal care and medications, being a family caregiver can be all-consuming.
But staying connected to your friends and social network is important. There’s growing research that shows the demands of caring for a family member and the isolation that often results can have a negative impact on a caregiver’s health. It increases the likelihood of a variety of conditions, ranging from depression to back injuries and other medical problems.
While it may be tough to accomplish, maintaining relationships with friends and family is important to a caregiver’s own wellness. The key lies in careful planning and a willingness to let others help.
Staying Connected
Here are some tips to help you balance your health and wellness with a loved one’s needs:
- Have realistic expectations: A good first step is to admit you can’t do everything like you always have. Although it may be difficult, tell your friends you need a break or won’t be able to attend every outing and event you used to, but you appreciate their efforts to still include you. Then give yourself permission to join your friends when it’s possible.
- Prioritize self-care: One of the best ways to maintain relationships is to make your own wellness a priority. It’s essential to remember that if you experience burnout or a health crisis, you won’t be able to care for your loved one at all. But if you find ways to take care of yourself, you’ll be a better caregiver. Carve out time for yourself, even if it’s just a few minutes in the morning to log some time on a walking pad or practice a few minutes of chair yoga.
- Share with friends: Share your victories, emotions and struggles with people who are close to you. Your true friends will genuinely want to know how you’re doing, and they’ll feel more valued if you ask them for help when you need it. By talking about your successes and challenges, you’ll provide them with opportunities to assist you, even if it’s simply by sending a daily text message.
- Schedule time with loved ones: When you are in the thick of caring for a loved one, time can easily get away from you. That’s why it’s crucial to mark time on the calendar for those who matter most. These family and friend appointments are just as important as any other appointment you can schedule. Set up a coffee break or lunch or another personal connection, if possible. But if that’s not feasible, take advantage of video chat platforms like Zoom or FaceTime. Consistency helps foster a sense of connection, even if you can’t meet in person.
- Enlist help: Family caregivers often feel as if they need to handle everything on their own. It’s often because they believe no one else can do as good a job as they do or they’re reluctant to ask for help. In reality, not accepting help often leads to a crisis for the caregiver and can even hurt the feelings of friends and family who genuinely want to help. If you don’t have anyone in the family who is available to help on a regular basis, explore local respite services at a senior living community. These are designed to give caregivers a break. If finances are an issue, your local agency on aging might have financial programs that can help.
- Remember, you’re not alone: Broadly speaking, approximately 100 million US adults are functioning as caregivers for a child, parent, or other relative. In 2020, it was estimated that 53 million in-home caregivers were providing care to senior adults, and that number continues to grow. There are online support groups that provide a way to find others experiencing the same challenges. Caregiver Way provides a safe place for thoughtfulness about caregiving topics provided by experts, valuable time-saving tips, as well as connection with others who are walking a similar path.
There’s help when you need it.
If you are an at-home caregiver struggling to find time to care for your own health and well-being, we invite you to contact an ASC location near you. One of our experienced team members will be happy to help you explore options ranging from respite to assisted living and memory care. We welcome in-person visits to talk about your loved one and welcome you any time.
